Scream Queens: ‘Seven Minutes In Hell’ Review

Scream Queens 'Truth Or Die'

Scream Queens decided to step it up a notch with a classic game of Truth or Dare. Not only that, there was plenty of murder to go around and, even without Denise making an appearance, this episode was a bucket full of laughs and suspense. While we’re still not any closer to solving the overall mystery, getting rid of three characters in one episode was a good idea as the victims didn’t really offer much in terms of laughs anyways.

Chanel #3, played by Billie Lourd, was hands down the star of this episode. I also love how she wears earrings over those earmuffs. Her and Chanel #5 have been great up to this point and their pact at the end of the episode is definitely something to look forward to. But do you really think they are going to outlive Oberlin? I doubt it unless, of course, they turn out to be the killers.

And no Denise Hemphill? What’s up with that? That’s some hashtag cahoots right there! I completely missed her hilarious attitude and catchy one-liners but this episode was still a step in the right direction after the previous two. This episode had a much fresher vibe from beginning to end and I think this may have been because the focus was mainly on the sorority rather than including other plotlines like Gigi and Dean Munsch.

So grab a Watermelon and Lime cooler, turn on your favorite jam and enjoy the review, Screamers!

The Zayday Something Administration

This series is full of jams and this episode was no exception. I love the inclusion of these classic songs throughout, especially Tubthumping because that’s MY jam fo’ real. But our episode started off with I Can’t Wait by Nu Shooz, an ’80s track that got the slumber party started with a bang.

We check in with the vote for KKT President and it turns out that we have a tie which means Chanel and Zayday will share the presidency. Chanel throws one of her trademark hissy fits and runs off to her room but not before blaming Chanel #5 for everything because Chanel #5 “is  an idiot and she’s weird,” which was fucking hilarious. We find out later, however, that Chanel voted for Zayday because she no longer wants to be president.

What?

Wait, WHAT? This actually shocked me as it was a pretty out-of-character thing for Chanel to do. That said, it also kinda makes sense since Chanel doesn’t want to be murdered by the Red Devil. She also doesn’t want to be in charge during a crisis because that would make her a “top target” when she would rather look like a skinnier Angelina Jolie.

Zayday proposes that the KKT sisters have a slumber party since there are two things that always happen: secrets are revealed and someone experiments with lesbianism. Obviously Chanel #3 is total lez for Predatory Lez so we pretty much know something is going down at this slumber party.

Chanel #3’s obsession with spin the bottle was great especially considering there were no dudes at the slumber party. Grace suggests they play Truth or Dare but Chanel #3 is very adamant about this whole spin the bottle thing. All of the minor characters have done well on this show because of their quirks and random backstory and Chanel #3 definitely stole the show.

Meanwhile, we check in with the Dickie Dollar Scholars who are having an intervention for their good friend Chad because he sleeps with too many older women. Chad has no problem admitting to sleeping with Dean Munsch and Denise and it appears as though he much prefers the older women over Chanel and her crying. Chad ends up making a decision to focus on Chanel even though he thought one of the most fun parts of college was sleeping with the faculty. The boys then decide to go on a panty raid at KKT after hearing about the slumber party so they take a vote…

Put 'Em Up

…and it’s unanimous. Also, Chad is thrilled. Best .gif ever!

Panty Raid

The Dickey Dollar Scholars head over to KKT to get the party started. By the way, I’m not sure if anyone caught this but the guy with no arms, Caulfield, ends up getting stuck because, well, he has no arms to climb. Pure jokes. I’m kinda glad they didn’t kill this guy off after he had his arms chopped off because it was unexpected and hilarious. The fact that the boys are required to climb a ladder in order to escape the Red Devil was the worst situation imaginable for Caulfield and you just knew it was game over for No Arms. This time he lost his head.

Caulfield loses his head

Yup, the Red Devil decided to play some croquet using an axe and Caulfield’s head. Not a good time to be a student at Wallace University.

Truth or Die

The girls are busy inside playing Spin The Bottle which was hilarious because Chanel #3 obviously wants to make out with Predatory Lez which she finally does.

I Guess We Have To Kiss

Being the daughter of Charles Manson isn’t easy and we finally got to find out why Chanel #3 wears earmuffs, although it wasn’t as good as I would have expected. After confronting Predatory Lez while she is practicing looking disinterested, Chanel #3 explains that something bad happened to every guy she has dated, including one guy who got so obsessed with her ears that he wanted to cut them off (hence the earmuffs). It looks like Chanel #3 and Predatory Lez are remaining Alibidibuddies and there vagina’s will never touch.

Eventually they get around to playing Truth or Dare. The rules of the game are pretty simple…either pick Truth and answer a question…truthfully. Or pick dare and make it obvious that you are probably the Red Devil. Of course, there’s a third option which Jennifer so eloquently points out and that is picking truth and lying which is definitely what the Red Devil would do. Chad completely rips on her about this but Chad is a complete moron so no one is surprised.

The game starts with Chanel #5 picking truth and Oberlin asks her whether her vagina has teeth. The fun really begins when Predatory Lez is picked. She goes with truth first which immediately worries Chanel #3 who blurts out that she secretly has feelings for Sam. This was actually fucking hilarious because there was no possible way Sam was going to know this and she lets the group know that Charles Manson is Chanel #3’s father. Double truth. Chanel #3 gets pissed and immediately picks Predatory Lez again, although I’m pretty sure that’s not how the game works. This time she chooses dare and Chanel #3 sends her to go sleep in the bathtub in the KKT basement. Also, Chad’s ‘Douche’ playlist was awesome because Tubthumping is my JAM!

I don’t know about you but this was one of my favorite songs in the ’90s so I absolutely loved the inclusion.

Things didn’t go very well for Predatory Lez in the KKT basement and she ends up getting murder by the Red Devil but not before our devil friend shows Sam his/her identity. More importantly, Predatory Lez says “I can help…” right before she is killed by suffocation.

In The Bag

Hmmm…I think that might be some sort of clue. And where the hell is Boone? I can only assume that he is definitely one of the Red Devil’s. That said, I’m starting to think there might be three of them at this point with Gigi calling all of the shots.

That wasn’t the end of all the murder either. After Hester finds Sam’s body, she is immediately accused of being the murderer and it certainly doesn’t help that she is one creepy fox.

Meanwhile, Chanel #5 and Roger head up to the bedroom for some sexy time but while Roger is trying to teach her some clicking language him and his brother invented, the Red Devil shows up with a nail gun and turns Roger into a pin cushion as Chanel #5 looks on.

Nailed It

I think it’s pretty safe to say that Chanel #5 is likely not the killer even though there are two Red Devil’s. Also, I don’t think any of the girls are smart enough to be able to pull something like this off so I’m guessing the Red Devil’s are both people who were not in attendance at the slumber party. I have no doubts that Boone is probably one of them at this point and hopefully all will be revealed soon.

Pin Head

Tunnel Of Death

After finding Roger’s body, Chanel immediately thinks Hester and Chanel #5 are the Red Devil’s and she also thinks it’s super suspicious that Haggie Gyllenhaal’s boyfriend Pete is no where to be found. We also know that Chanel #5 is a psychopath that no one likes, according to Chanel. Classic Oberlin. Chad eventually comes across a secret tunnel in the closet and Grace comes to the conclusion that none of the girls could be the killer…and she is probably right.

Zayday and Chanel head down into the secret tunnels where Oberlin gives us a nice little lecture about the former KKT presidents and what they were renowned for, including one of them who brought cocaine to KKT. While walking through the tunnels, they are obviously attacked by one of the Red Devil’s, who almost kills Zayday, but the girls are able to escape after Chanel knocks the Red Devil out with some random lamp.

X Marks The Spot

I really don’t think either of these two are the Red Devil’s, especially considering Zayday was almost murdered. At this point, Dean Munsch, Grace’s dad, Pete and Denise were all missing from the slumber party so the likelihood of those four being involved just went way up. Grace’s dad and Dean Munsch return to the KKT house and Grace’s dad wants her out of the sorority. A bit suspicious maybe? Of course, Grace refuses to go with him, leading to Jennifer saying the funniest line of the episode:

"Oh, I just kinda came over here because I farted over there and it smelled bad."

I think it’s inevitable that Jennifer is going to eventually be killed off but for now, I am going to enjoy every moment of her because she is fucking hilarious. It’s also worth noting that Chanel #3 and Chanel #5 make a pact to outlive Chanel due to the fact that they both can’t stand her. Still not sold that these two are involved with the murders but the fact that Chanel #5 gets blamed for everything and Chanel #3 is Charles Manson’s daughter, I’d love to see them stay alive much longer.

Stayin' Alive

Chanel ends up buying everyone a gift so the girls can defend themselves against the Red Devil. Jennifer thinks they’re giant pink chopsticks (LOL) but really they’re pink nunchucks. That was, like, totally super nice of Chanel to give her KKT sisters a gift, wasn’t it?

"I even kinda like Zayday now so I bought you all gifts."

Plus, Chanel #3 did this and I couldn’t stop laughing:

tastes-like-pink

And after receiving their new gifts, Zayday announces that in O-Town, no slumber party is complete without a kick ass dance party. Such a great way to forget that all these people they knew were brutally murdered. Plus, Hester did this:

Hester gets her dance on

KAPPA! So random how they all broke out in dance at the end even though half the school has been murdered at the hands of the Red Devil. And in case you’re wondering what track they were jammin’ to, you can check it out below. It’s called I Melt With You by Modern English. These jams are just awesome, show! Keep ’em coming:

So once again it looks like were still not even close to solving the mystery of the Red Devil. I’d like to think I’m right about Boone but something tells me this is going to be way more complicated in the end. Wouldn’t it be hilarious if every single remaining character ends up being the Red Devil at some point in the series? I wouldn’t rule out that possibility.

The Verdict

Episode Score: MIKEY  LIKES IT
Mikey Likes ItWho would have thought that an entire episode of Scream Queens without Denise Hemphill would have been this good. Not me. I genuinely enjoyed Seven Minutes In Hell and surprisingly, it was more because they started killing people off. With Caulfield, Predatory Lez and Roger getting murdered, we are slowly running out of characters. I think it’s pretty obvious that Boone is one of the Red Devil’s and I’ll be shocked if he’s not but who could the original Red Devil be? And what exactly is Gigi’s motivation in leading these guys to kill everyone?

Hopefully we get some answers as this murder mystery appears to be dragging on. And hopefully Denise Hemphill returns next week because her sassyness and hilarious facial expressions were definitely missed.

This episode was great though. The jokes were fresh, the music was dope and there was a lot of murder. We’re really only down to all of the main characters and I get the feeling the Red Devil is going to turn out being the person we least expect…maybe Jennifer? Wouldn’t that be quite the twist.

Be sure to vote for who you think is the Red Devil below. And let us know what you thought of Seven Minutes In Hell in the comments. Was it as delicious as a watermelon lime cooler or did it stink like Jennifer’s gross fart?

Lastly, check out the promo for the next episode of Scream Queens, titled Beware of Young Girls where it looks like we’ll be getting more info on Gigi and the Red Devil’s. To take a quote from my good friend Chanel, have fun being dead, fellow Screamers!