The Walking Dead: ‘Twice As Far’ Review

The Walking Dead 'Doctor Dead'

“I love you all here. I do. But I have to kill for you, and I can’t. I won’t.” -Carol

Shit just got serious on The Walking Dead and ‘Twice As Far’ finally killed off someone from Rick’s group. They have been pretty lucky up to this point considering they have been able to murder a whole ton of Saviors who have not been able to scare the shit out of anyone yet. Seriously though, if you actually think about it, the Saviors have been less of a threat than those sneaky wolves who were at least able to actually take out some of the Alexandrians.

Luckily, the cloak of invincibility is finally wearing off and Denise clearly should have stayed home. The original group of Alexandrians are dropping like flies considering they have no idea what the fuck they’re doing when they come out from behind the walls. There is not a whole lot of them remaining (I think Heath, Spencer, Aaron and Enid are the only notable ones left) so I’m not quite sure that Rick’s presence has been a good thing for these people. At least the Saviors finally made an impact. In my opinion, they haven’t been much of a threat at all up to this point considering the kill count is like 21-1. I have a feeling that this is going to change soon.

‘Twice As Far’ was one of the better slower-paced episodes and I think this had a lot to do with the fact that certain characters are much more fun to watch when they’re paired up with the right people. Abraham and Eugene always have a way of making me laugh and, surprisingly, having Daryl, Rosita and Denise team up to hit up the local apothecary was a pleasant surprise. Plus, Dwight returned for a short reunion with Daryl but it is pretty clear that something Negan-related happened to his face after their last encounter. And with Carol making the dumbest decision ever to leave Alexandria by herself without telling anyone, I think it’s only a matter of time before the Saviors and Alexandrians square off again.

Now grab yourself a backpack full of prescription drugs, and maybe a couple of sodas if that’s your jam, and enjoy the review, fellow walkers!

Same Shit, Different Day

Everyone in Alexandria is in routine mode with all of our characters repeatedly doing the same things day in and day out. Olivia is checking inventory (and no, I cannot believe this woman is still alive and has screen time), Morgan is practicing his best ninja turtle moves, Gabriel is doing a whole lot of nothing and Eugene and Sasha have joined the Night’s Watch so they can protect the wall. It was all very boring stuff so thankfully they skipped over all of the routine this time around.

We catch up with Daryl and Carol who are chillin’ on their mama’s porch…

Standin' on your mama's porch You told me that it'd last forever

…and reminiscing about old times. Unfortunately for them, this is not a Bryan Adams songs and the good times are not going to last forever. Carol is struggling with the fact that she has become a chain-smoking mass murderer and acknowledges the fact that these Saviors didn’t even do anything to her or Maggie since they were totally able to murder everyone before anything bad could happen to them.

Denise, Rosita and Daryl decide to go on a mission to check out, and raid, a nearby apothecary so they can get their hands on some prescription drugs. We also caught up with this walker, who is totally practicing his pole dancing moves:

Pole Dancing

Unfortunately for this cute guy, it appears he has gotten the pole jammed through his face so I have a feeling that this might affect his performance. Being a walker would totally suck balls.

Also, being Denise would totally suck too because she has apparently never left Alexandria in this new post-apocalyptic world. This is clearly a recipe for disaster and Daryl knows it. Denise, on the other hand, thinks she will be totally fine.

"What's the worst that could happen?"

So off we go on a side quest for drugs with Rosita, Denise and Daryl taking a pick-up truck to their destination. The only problem: Daryl is not very good at driving a stick shift. Luckily for him, Denise knows a thing or two about old pick-up trucks and is able to provide some last minute advice.

Meanwhile, Eugene and Abraham are on a side quest of their own and I absolutely love it when these two are together. When The Walking Dead puts the right people together, the show immediately gets that much better and Eugene and Honest Abe are the perfect pairing. Plus, I pretty much love everything about Eugene, the world’s greatest lock picker, and I love where they are going with his story which appears to be aligning with the comics. Eugene is at his best when it comes to picking locks and this skill came in handy once again when him and Abe break into an old abandoned building.

"Easy peasy, tick tick click, there is no lock I cannot pick."

So you might be asking what in the hell these two are doing here? Well, Eugene is all about the manufacturing industry and he really wants to start making bullets. Wait, what?! Is this really a good idea? Sure, there are other groups in the world that are ready to go to war but I don’t think trading bullets to your enemies is such a great idea. At least they’ll have a huge supply of bullets for their own use which they will likely need once Negan finally shows up. Plus, it wouldn’t be a bad thing if they no longer had to worry about ‘wasting ammo’.

Abe and Eugene are rudely interrupted by a walker but Eugene calls dibs before Abraham and attempts to butcher said walker with his knife but this particular walker is a lot smarter than the others and has made himself a helmet which he is able to use as a shield:

Blocked

Ya, this was a really terrible killing attempt by Eugene and I still don’t understand why these morons can’t assess the situation before blindly wielding their weapons. The walkers don’t look that difficult to kill so I always have to laugh when Eugene or Denise or Spencer end up in these ridiculous situations. Get your shit together, people! Abraham was pretty much saying my thoughts out loud when he was counting down strikes every time Eugene fucked up. I agree with Abraham, Eugene would have had better luck picking up a turd by its clean end.

Since this is The Walking Dead, Eugene and Abraham obviously get in an argument which leaves Abraham basically telling Eugene to find his own way back and all I could do is shake my head. Can’t they all just get along for once? Apparently the answer is no…but only temporarily.

Slings and Arrows 

Daryl, Denise and Rosita arrive at the pharmacy and find the mother load as they come across an entire room full of drugs and medication. Thankfully Nick from Fear The Walking Dead is nowhere to be found otherwise they would totally have to keep these drugs on lock down.

Denise decides to do some exploring of her own but it’s pretty clear that she is not psychologically prepared to deal with this new world. She comes across a room with a whole lot of death and this walker who totally looks like one of the muppets:

"Hi!"

I don’t really understand why Denise and many other people are so devastated by this new world. Science would suggest that something like this happening is inevitable so it amazes me how unprepared some of these people are in acknowledging the fact that we have no choice but to hit the reset button on human civilization. I don’t necessarily see this as a bad thing either especially when considering that Donald Trump could eventually be president. Maybe a zombie apocalypse wouldn’t be so bad after all.

After collecting the drugs, the group heads back, this time taking Rosita’s path along the train tracks, where Denise sees a parked vehicle and, for some idiotic reason, decides that she wants to see what’s inside. It’s decisions like this that make me want to strangle these people because stopping to check this abandoned vehicle was pointless in every way, especially given the fact that there was only some soda inside. I could totally understand if this was a cooler full of beer…but soda? Come on, Denise. Why do these people continue to make these moronic decisions is beyond me but at least we have one less character with a name starting with the letter ‘D’.

And at least Daryl and Rosita agree with me that this is a giant waste of time. Denise obviously decides to ignore Daryl and Rosita, possibly due to the fact that she’s super thirsty, and ends up in a delicate situation when the walker in the vehicle attempts to sexually assault her.

"I like being on top."

Denise is finally able to handle the situation before Daryl and Rosita can intervene and save her but had she not decided to stop in the first fucking place, she would totally still be alive. This little side trip gave the Saviors enough time to find these three and it ultimately cost Denise her life because this happened and I immediately lost my shit:

Archery Increased to 19

Yup, Dr. Denise is now Dr. Dead. I had put all my money on Spencer being the next one to go but Denise was my second choice so I’m totally down with this happening. Plus, I was definitely not expecting this to happen but it’s about fucking time the Saviors got on the board because they have literally been getting slaughtered up to this point. I think Dr. Carson’s workload just increased significantly.

Even with this happening though, I’m still not believing that the Saviors are a real threat because Daryl, Rosita, Abraham and Eugene were able to get themselves out of this situation unharmed. It’s like the Saviors aren’t even trying. Dwight, whom we met during the first half of the season, is now sporting a burned face and one can only assume that Negan was the one behind this.

The Dwight Stuff

The Saviors have somehow kidnapped Eugene but luckily Abraham is hiding behind some dumpsters with his finger on the trigger. Dwight and his friends only want one thing and that’s to get inside Alexandria so they can take whatever they want. Luckily, Eugene is a quick thinker and totally rats out Honest Abe in order to distract these clowns long enough so he can bite Dwayne in the dick.

When using your teeth is totally appropriate

Wait, what?! Did Eugene just start a gunfight by attempting to eat Dwight’s penis? Yup, you bet that totally happened and it was epic. Guns start going off like crazy and, obviously, only Saviors die. Even though they were once again completely outnumbered. Daryl and his crew were able to escape with only one casualty and the Saviors just can’t seem to maintain any momentum as they are forced to run away.

I was slightly worried that Eugene got shot but luckily it was only a graze and he’s going to survive. Thank god too because Eugene is one of my favorite characters, especially when he’s interacting with Abraham. This quote especially made me laugh:

“You know how to bite a dick, Eugene. I mean that with the utmost of respect.”

Once again, everyone returns to Alexandria and all I can hope for is that the Saviors are finally going to grow some balls and make an attack instead of getting murdered in the woods over and over again. Sadly, I don’t think my prayers will be answered because Carol has decided that she can no longer kill anymore and has left Alexandria to do her own thing. Carol…what the fuck are you thinking just leaving a note and taking off? You know some of these idiots are going to look for you and will more than likely encounter our Savior friends again during this search. This idiotic decision by Carol may just be the reason some of her close friends are about to end up six feet under.

I absolutely don’t agree with Carol’s decision here. It’s 100% the wrong one and I can’t believe she just took off like this. Did she really think that telling people not to come after her was going to work? I’m starting to think that Carol was spending a little too much time with Sam because this is not a logical decision whatsoever.

With Carol making her way back into the forest, and with only two episodes remaining, we’re obviously getting ready for yet another showdown between the Saviors and the Alexandrians, only this time I get the feeling that not everyone will be making it out alive so easily. And Spencer is totally going to be one of the victims, right?! Right?!?!

The Verdict

Episode Score: MIKEY LIKES EUGENE
Mikey Likes It

‘Twice As Far’ was psychologically pleasing in every way with Rick’s group finally losing one of their own. Not that Denise will be missed, because she won’t. I definitely was not expecting her to take a random arrow through the skull while giving a speech but that was exactly what happened and now Negan’s group of Saviors are finally on the board. This might be just what they needed to wake them up considering they haven’t been much of a threat up until now.

My only complaint is that we didn’t see Tara cry over Denise’s death which means this is going to have to happen at some point during the final two episodes of the season. I could totally go without this but I think it’s safe to say that it’s unavoidable. With Denise’s death, Tara is pretty much useless now so I can’t imagine she’s going to be around much longer anyways.

So what do the Saviors have in store for Rick and company now? Will they attack Alexandria directly? Clearly not since everyone is going to be looking for Carol now that she made that really dumb decision to leave. I expect big things to come in the final two episodes, I just have no idea how this super-hyped showdown is going to go down but I do expect a lot of the dead weight to, well, die.

So what did everyone think of ‘Twice As Far’? Were you happy to see Dr. Denise get an arrow through her head? Or did this episode hurt just as much as Dwight getting his dick bitten by Eugene? Let us know all of your thoughts and theories in the comments and thanks for reading, fellow walkers!

Only two episodes left and I just know that people are going to die. We’re going ‘East’ next week, possibly to look for Carol, so be sure to check out the promo below:

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